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Guys, Men, Husbands, Fathers

Thoughtful man.

I’ve been a husband for almost 25 years, about half my life now. For the most part I think we guys, men, husbands, fathers get a bad wrap from society, occasionally for good reason but usually because of stereotypes or for sport. Not all men are the same but there are some commonalities to many […]

What is Gatekeeping?

Gate

One of the questions that I get asked about marital sex is, what exactly is a gatekeeper? What does a gatekeeper do? Why is gatekeeping not a good thing? Well basically a gatekeeper allows for regular sex but only on their terms. They limit sex to only those things they are comfortable doing very seldom […]

The Power of Eroticism in Marital Sex

Couple embracing

One of my favorite posts by Dr. David Schnarch (affiliate link) is People Have Sex Within The Limits of Their Development. it is one of my favorites because it challenges the reader to realize that to mature beyond their current limits will require some feelings of nervousness and anxiety. The process toward maturity is not […]

You May Think You’re Being Generous, Per

You May Think You’re Being Generous, Perhaps You’re Just a Gatekeeper

Perhaps you are no longer refusing your spouse sex and you feel you’re being a generous by going past your preference for less sex but don’t realize that you have moved from being an outright refuser of sex to a gatekeeper of sexual pleasure. What is the difference between a “refuser” and a “gatekeeper”? A […]

This Isn’t a Sex Blog…

This Isn’t a Sex Blog…

it’s a marriage blog. There are a number of reasons that I write so much about sex. First, I’m a married man that enjoy sex with my wife. Second, sex is what differentiates marriage from every other relationship. Two perfectly healthy individuals married but not having sex might as well be roommates sharing expenses. Third, […]

Why Don’t Women Need Sex?

Why Don’t Women Need Sex?

J’s post Does Sexy Lingerie Promote a Perverted View of Beauty? got me to thinking about perceived differences between men and women. Honestly, it actually began with two posts by Pastor Bob Russell, Wives, Help Your Husbands Stay Pure! (1 Corinthians 6-7) and Husbands, Help Your Wives Stay Pure!, but J’s post is what prompted […]

Intimacy Isn’t Just a Code Word for Sex

Intimacy Isn’t Just a Code Word for Sex

A post by J at Hot, Holy & Humorous and another by Julie over at Intimacy in Marriage got me to thinking about intimacy in marriage and, no, I don’t just mean sex. This is how I’d like us to define intimacy for this and all our discussions: Intimacy is the act of allowing someone […]

 
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